If you're confident, you're humble, you work your ass off, and you always on a daily basis, look to bring value. To the person that you're interning for, the company that you're working for, the relationship that you're looking to strengthen or whatever it may be, humility, confidence, hard work and value every time I'm around people like that I'm like, man, I like her. Welcome back to The Art of Connecting Podcast. This is your host here, Haydynn, back with another episode for you. And today I have Maddie Aitchison here on with me today. I know I said your name right, because I remember listening to your podcast on Action Academy and I'm sure people get it wrong all the time, so I'm, I'm quite proud that I can get your last name right. Well done brother. You know, usually I don't even correct people'cause I'm used to them saying my last name wrong my whole life. So when somebody says it right, I give'em two thumbs up. So well done. I love it. That's the same thing with my name. Whenever people try to spell it, it's, it's almost always wrong, but I'm just like, yeah, it's whatever. I don't care anymore. Yeah. So, well we get to do this today. I always tell the story of how I got connected to the people that I'm interviewing.'cause I think it's really cool to go to talk about like. Yeah, how did I meet these people? And we got connected through Brian Lubin with the Action Academy podcast and the community that he has in there. And several of my guests have actually been through the community as well, of people who are just getting after it and also connecting with people and creating relationships. So we're super excited to have you on the show today. Yeah. Thanks for having me, man. Always fun connect. I mean, it's, it's like to the point of your podcast, right, is you just never know where relationships are, are gonna take you, what doors are gonna open, you know, and what doors are behind the doors. So it's always fun connecting with great people and oftentimes, right, great people know other great people. So when you get an opportunity to connect those dots, I always take advantage of it. Yeah, that's exactly it. So just like most podcasts start why don't you go ahead and just introduce yourself and tell people a little bit about what you do. Yeah, I mean, I'm a, I'm a full-time commercial real estate investor. I. I eat, sleep, and breathe. Commercial real estate is kind of my core focus. To kind of take you back to the beginning, I always knew that I wanted to, you know, pursue a path of financial freedom. Didn't really know what that looked like, you know, fortunately I was blessed early on, you know, both my parents were corporate America kind of. You know, long time follow the traditional narrative and standard that was of their generation. They were divorced, you know, when I was early and my dad was very conservative with money. My mom kind of had the very entrepreneurial risk taking mindset. And so she, when she had, you know, freedom and, and a little bit of time would take me to real estate investing seminars when I was like. 11, 12, 13. Wow. Yeah, so I was, I was fortunate enough to kind of get in those ecosystems early on and kind of see what was possible when people pursued this, you know, this path of financial freedom and being your own boss and, you know, no income ceiling or limit on what you could earn. And you know, obviously making an impact through investing in some of the different strategies that I saw, you know, people up on stage with the big checks. And so early on that kind of planted the seed of wow real estate. But that then laid dormant for some time. I went to college and kind of got my first exposure to an entrepreneur. I worked for a guy that had kind of like a small insurance brokerage and worked my way up from being a cold caller for him to kind of being one of his right hands, you know, call it executive assistants. And when I was graduating, he wanted me to take over his book of business and I went. You, you showed me what's possible, man, I don't wanna work for somebody else. So I moved back home, and this was in 2010 when foreclosures were kind of everywhere, post financial crisis here in California. And I was interviewing, you know, 30,$40,000 a year jobs. Couldn't even land one of those. And I remember one day I was like, man, this is just not gonna cut it. So. I was on Craigslist of all places. Real estate mentor seeks real estate mentee. I click on the ad, I called the number, and that ultimately led me to my first mentor where I ended up working for a guy for a year for free. He was buying houses off the courthouse steps and flipping properties, and I was helping him with, you know, underwriting and project management and disposition. And I saw him making 50, 60, 70 grand a pop. I was doing all the work. My first, you know my, my first lesson in leverage in, in delegation. But I I started to build up confidence in like, Hey, I can do this. I was still broke, living at home, 21 years old. But I had energy, I had, you know, maybe not the resources, but resourcefulness, you know, and that spirit in my heart. And I was just willing to, to work my ass off and, and really whatever it took. So I. Long story short, that led me to finding my very first flip when I was 21. I purchased that property a hundred percent using other people's money after paying off my first lender. My second lender, I netted$106,000 on that deal. And that was kind of like the no looking back moment for me. Wow. Where I went on to flip a couple hundred houses. Slowly started to build up a single family rental portfolio and quickly learned I'm gonna need a lot of doors in order to get to kind of the financial freedom numbers that I had in my mind. And so I kind of took a step back and said, Hey, what do I wanna make? You know, what's my target and when do I wanna get there by? And so my goal was if, you know, I can get to$500,000 a year in passive income from my real estate assets. In the next 10 years, what do I need to do in order to to do that? And so I kind of reverse engineered a very simple model. I need to buy one asset a year that nets me 50 KA year. And if I can do that for 10 years straight, that'll get me to my goal. And as I quickly, you know, went back to work, I learned men. There's no single family properties that are gonna net me 50 KA year. So that's what led me into commercial real estate. I bought my first shopping center using creative finance that led me to buy my first hotel. My first hotel led to my second, my third hotel. And then I started accumulating some medical office buildings and some retail shopping centers. The portfolio has, you know, changed and evolved over the, you know, last, you know, call it 12 years of my commercial career. And now, you know, I focus solely on owning and operating my own commercial estate portfolio. I consult and coach with other family offices and private equity groups. I've got a mastermind group for commercial estate investors that are looking to do the same based on their financial goals. And it's fun, man. I love I love the world of real estate investing, wealth building. And of course I'm a, I'm a dad of three little girls. I've been. You know, married to my beautiful wife for well, we've been together for almost 15 years now. But it's been a, it's been a fun riding journey for sure. That's, that's that's no doubt. That's awesome. So I wanna hop in the time machine and take, take, like, take a, take a, take a trip back to Craigslist and just ask about that mentorship ad because when I, when I hear that. The first thing I think of is like, this is a scam. I thought you, that's where you're gonna go. You're like, you got scammed, but you actually ended up meeting someone who was helpful and good so. What did that look like when you responded to that ad? What, what was that meeting like? What was that conversation like with this guy that that ended up being your mentor? Yeah, I mean, and when I say mentor mentors can be great mentors or bad mentors, right? They can teach you a lot of what to do and what not to do, and this was that type of mentor. He was somebody that had amassed a lot of great wealth. Was obviously skilled in, you know, his trade of buying low, fixing up and selling high and had built a great, you know, business model and, and wealth from that. And when it came to core values, integrity, ethics, a lot of the things that didn't align with me, I learned a lot of what not to do. As well. So it was a great, I call it my baptism to real estate investing. You know, it was a, it was a great way to get in proximity and into the ecosystem and just seeing what's possible. And I remember when I called that ad. He basically called me into his office you know, said, Hey, here's one deal that I wanna see if you can, you know, support me on It was mainly around, you know, being a runner and project management and just kind of being a grunt, right? And just going, Hey, is this guy willing to follow instructions and put in the work? And I was the one that was, you know, I'm a big believer that when one door opens and you decide to walk through it, you know, there's, there's many other doors behind it. And so I knew that if I just walked through this door, put my head down, worked hard, you know, stayed humble, constantly looked to add value in every capacity that I could, you know, didn't ask for something that I didn't earn. And I put a time commitment on that. I'm willing to work for this guy for a year for free. That led me into obviously tons of growth and opportunity that I would not have had if I didn't, you know, sacrifice and burn a lot of those calories that I ended up burning that year. But it was one of those things where, you know, I was at a state and a place where I knew that I just needed to get in a room. Around the people who were doing what I wanted to do. I needed to be in proximity. And through that proximity, I would find a way to kind of, you know, through osmosis morph myself, my identity, my skills into a more, you know, valuable state that I could parlay into the next stepping stone in my journey. So I said, I'll commit to this for 12 months, no matter what it entails, as long as it's, you know, something that's not completely misaligned with, you know what I know, or my non-negotiables. I'll, I'll see this through. And, and there were many, I mean, that first year I thought about quitting 5, 6, 7 times. Thankfully I didn't obviously, you know, it led me to so many great opportunities and things that I would've never had if I would've just kind of cut bait and pulled the rip cord and gone into the safe route. And, you know, that that was a very challenging year for me. But it was also, you know, I think for anybody that can relate, pain is a part of every path that leads to progress and growth in your life. It's not the seasons or the, you know, the trails that are easy, that create skills and, and confidence and, you know, build those calluses that are necessary as an entrepreneur to go and unlock success. So for me, it was one of those things where I said, no matter what happens. This is my commitment and you know, your word is your bond. How you do one thing is ultimately how you do everything. And so I said I'm gonna leave it all on the metaphorical, you know, floor of investing. No stone left unturned, no, you know, ounce of sweat, energy and effort that I won't leave out. On that, you know, one year timeframe. And and, and that was something that, you know, obviously I had to earn my way into, you know, new opportunities and new things. But that one conversation is what opened the door that, you know, has led to a pretty wild journey in, in real estate investing. That's amazing. I, I I think about a, a conversation I was just having with, with my contractor. We were, we were dinner. Me and my contractor are very close with each other, and it's a huge blessing. We've actually had him on the podcast before and we were just talking, he was like, it's so hard to find good talent, you know, and he's, he's been having a hard time with some of his employees and his managers and stuff like that, and. I told'em about my team and I was like, both of my full-time employees approached me and said that they wanted to work for me for free. I said, I told'em that like my vision was so big in what I'm doing, that they heard about it and they wanted to be a part of it, whether I could pay them or not. And like he, his eyes got big and he was like, am I thinking too small? And, and I was like, I don't know. I can't answer that question for you, but all I know is any time that I have a talent need in my organization, it just, it shows up, right? Like there are people that are out there that, that are willing to sacrifice getting necessarily like paid today. But like my director of operations, for example, she works fully on commission for everything. Once I have my operations up and running on my events company and the mastermind group that I'm working on should make it a hundred grand a year at 20 years old. So like, yep, people, humans can tell when your vision is big enough for you to, for them to come alongside and be a part of it. I think that really just speaks to, to you too, in that early stage, and this is kind of like what I was getting at, is for the, some of the people that listen to this show are. In their W2 or maybe they're younger. I have a lot of younger people that listen as well and they're like, I just don't know how to get started. Offer your time up for free, like to someone who is where you would like to be in the short term. Yeah. That's no one. If, if someone that was smart and had drive and you could see'em and they approached you, Maddie and said, Hey, I, I want to come work for you for free, would you tell them No. I mean, I got a, I've got interns that come in and outta my ecosystem all the time that are, you know, looking to, to learn and add value. And it's very it's very apparent of the ones who have good intentions and really do wanna add value and be there to learn and grow and understand. How those deposits into an ecosystem can really serve them when it's time for them to make a withdrawal. Right. And, and ask for, for some support and get into that next level. And it's very apparent of the ones that are just there to, to take Right. And to, to, to self-serve. I think, you know, a big thing that I always tell people. There's a formula that I call the likability formula that has opened up so many doors and relationships for me that, you know, I probably didn't have maybe the resume or the balance sheet or the experience or the, you know, insert whatever, you know item of lacking, you know, you might feel. To, you know, earn that opportunity to be around that person or be in that deal or whatever it may be. And as I've, you know, had been, been fortunate enough to be in a lot of rooms, a lot of mentors, a lot of people that were, you know, I'm like, man, I can't believe this person's, you know, inviting me to this event or is including me in this deal, or is, you know, asking me for this or whatever it may be. As I've. I reflected on that and I've asked them like, Hey, why did you do that? Or this or that? I'm a very curious and inquisitive person, so I always, you know, I have no problem asking questions. Most of the answers are something that every single person can do to create more opportunities and relationships in their life, and it was, I just like you. I wanna see you succeed. I just like you. I want to help you with this. You remind me of myself that, so with that being said, I start, okay, well, but like, what do you mean by that? Like, I, I appreciate that you like me, but like what qualities and traits, you know, have make you like somebody? And so, over the course of asking this question, a lot of times to a lot of smart and wealthy people, I've boiled it down to what I call the likability formula. And it's something that any single person can do. Today, right now you, you can be these things. Number one is humility. Like everybody's got, you know, the. Areas of their life that they are confident and believe and and know what they know. But there's always something to be said about just being curious and staying in a constant state of humility. No matter what your success level is. People admire those that have this quality and trait of just being humble. The second part of that though, is a word that I just said. Confidence, right? Not cockiness, but just this level of I'm confident in who I am. I'm confident in what I bring to the table. I'm confident that if I don't know this thing, I can figure it out for you. I'm confident that if you gimme this challenge, I'll deliver on it. I'm con you're betting on yourself, right? That confidence. So humility plus confidence creates a very likable person. But let's add in two more qualities and traits that every single person can choose to do and be. Every single day. Number three is hard work. It doesn't. Effort is something that every single person is in control of. So if you show up confident but humble and you're willing to work your ass off, that makes for a very likable person. And then the last piece is if you can be very strategic in how you consistently show up and bring number four value. If you're confident, you're humble, you work your ass off, and you always on a daily basis, look to bring value. To the person that you're interning for, the company that you're working for, the relationship that you're looking to strengthen or whatever it may be, humility, confidence, hard work and value that, I don't know about you, but every time I'm around people like that and I leave that person or that person leaves my presence, I'm like, man, I like her. Like she's, she's a killer. Like I, I wanna be around her. I want her in my world. Like I wanna help her succeed. Right? Same goes for anybody that. You know, has an opportunity to show up in a new internship or have a new mentor, or you go to a mastermind event or a conference, right? Like if you can be the person that people are like, I like that person. Like they're, they're cool. There's something about them, right? That's all you really need to hook them to get in their ecosystem. And then from there, it's how you show up once you're through the door, right? And so likability, I think, is a great way to open up doors. Now what you do once you walk through that door. Obviously more strategy, you know, more nuanced, but if you can do those things consistently on a daily basis, it will be amazing and probably surprising to the level of people and opportunities that you can attract just by being a little bit more likable. So a, a question that I get asked by newer people who are, are getting into this is, how do I bring value when I feel like I don't know what I'm doing and I don't already know, you know, how to do that? Yeah. I mean, I think at the end of the day, you have to understand the game that you're playing. So, you know, I'll just equate it to chess. You know, the first time you sit down to a chess board, you know that there's some outcome that you're driving towards, but there's a lot of different moves. There's a lot of different pieces on the board. There's potential competition that you've gotta navigate. There's a lot of complexities and nuances to the game. But you know that there is some type of strategy that will allow me to win this game. So depending on what you're solving for, and the outcome is where I go, okay? If we're clear on what the outcome is that we're solving for, and we can understand based on the opportunity or the relationship where the pain point is, then you can identify based on that pain point. What opportunities or gaps you can fill or get to work on filling in order to bring and showcase some level of value, something tangible that is felt and experienced by, you know, the, the individual or the opportunity that you can measure being an item of value to somebody. So, you know. Somebody that says they don't know how to identify what level of value they can bring, I would say that that is, you know, it's, it's a very uncreative, un proactive approach to identifying what value you can bring. There's a lot of different strategies, depending on the circumstance and the outcome that you're driving towards, that you could identify ways to bring value to people. And so I would just say, what game are you playing? Who are you playing it with? What's their biggest problem? What strategy are they deploying to solve that problem? And based on your skillset. Or skills that you need to develop. There are many proactive approaches you can take to deliver that value over time. A friend of mine Peter, Pasternack, he's out of Atlanta, and he actually used to be on, like, flip this house, a TV show or something like that back in the day. And he's flipped hundreds of houses to, and a lot of rental properties and everything. And he gets up in front of conferences, thousands of people, and he says, I hate driving. Driving is my least favorite thing in the world to do. And if I never had to drive again in my life, then I would be happy. So if you wanna learn what I, you know, if you wanna learn whatever you wanna learn from me, drive me around for the day. You can drive my S class. I'm gonna sit in the passenger seat and I'll tell you whatever you want to know. And I was like, man, that is. Like that would be such an easy thing for someone who lives in Atlanta. There you go. You get a day off and you just say, Hey Peter, can I drive you around for the day? And he's gonna be like, yes. And you can ask whatever you want. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's a perfect example, right? And that's a simple example of going, what's one thing that people do every day that they don't like doing? You know, whether that's responding to emails, that's creating systems, that's, you know, connecting in online forums and platforms that's driving, you name it. Right? I mean, we could come up with a list of a thousand things based on the context of, you know, the opportunity you're looking at. And find, I mean, shit, go and put it in chat, GBT and say, Hey, here's my situation. Here is what I'm looking to solve for, which is to be in proximity to these people to add value to this organization. Here's what they do. Here's some of the projects that they're working on. I'm having. Trouble identifying what items of value I could tangibly, tactically, or strategically offer to them. Give me a list of 50 ways that based on my situation and who I am and what my skillset is that I could deliver value to this person or this organization. I mean, here's the thing. You know, one of the mindset shifts that me and my team, and really it's just become a core value of our company now, is AI. First, you know, you, you hear people continue to say that. AI is going to displace and, you know, eliminate jobs and that's not incorrect. But at the same time, it's gonna create so many new opportunities, so many new industries. And ultimately it's gonna be the person who continues to find ways to adopt and leverage ai. That's gonna be the ones that are at an advantage. And so when we shifted this mindset, maybe about a year and a half ago. I mean, I use chat, GPT, Gemini, you know, grok 90% of my day now versus Google. And so I was at a Mastermind not long ago and one of the guys said, if somebody comes to you with a question. Because he's like, I used to, if somebody came to me with a question or a problem, I'd say, you know, go and Google it. It's out there somewhere. You can figure this out, and if you can't figure it out, then come back to me. Right? He goes, now, there's no longer an excuse for you not being able to solve and answer your questions or to close the gap on your problems. AI is smarter than any human that is out there right now, and they can solve your problems and answer your questions and help you strategize and do things and in ways. That was not even possible or even thought possible. You know, a decade ago now, if you just have the mindset that AI first is a solution to every problem that I have, and you can find ways to continue to leverage talking about relationships, AI is a key and new and exponential relationship that has changed my life, my business, my kids, my wife. So. If you have a problem that you're looking to solve or you have a question that you're looking to tease out an answer to. AI first should always be your mindset of I need to learn how to master using this platform, this extension of, you know, value that I have, and how can I use this as a way to close the gap and bring more value to the people that are in the world that I wanna be playing in. And so anybody that says they don't know how to answer those kind of questions, I always go AI first. AI first. Don't, don't, don't come to me until you've shown me that you have exercised. Extreme diligence in finding an answer to this question because I guarantee you, if you make me go and answer this question for you, I could have already given you that answer by using chat GBT or using ai. So I think you know now more than ever, people have an advantage to leverage these tools in a way that can help them bring significant value to new relationships or existing relationships that they wanna strengthen. I think about the opposite side of that too, though. Because almost all of my mentor, like mentorship and relationships have come from me sitting down in front of somebody and just asking them like all of my questions. Like I, my mentor who's done all the private lending, he's lent me, I've had a million dollars out with him at any given time. Oh, hey there. It's me again. I know you expected Morgan Freeman to come on and talk about the biggest company in the world. Well, I'm sorry, but you get the next best thing. This show is sponsored by the company that I co founded, Acadia Capital, and acadia is a hard money lending fund originating loans in Southeast Tennessee and Northern Georgia on residential one to four unit renovation properties. We are regulation D five Oh six C fund and are actively seeking accredited investors. We provide fantastic first position real estate back returns. If you're ready to get your tired and lazy capital to work with a minimum 8 percent return, go to Acadia loans. com backslash invest. Not only do we accept standard investments, but we can also accept self directed IRAs and other self directed retirement accounts to take advantage of tax advantage investing. Thank you so much for listening to Art of Connecting now back to the show. And I built my relationship with him because I went and sat in his mansion, in his kitchen and just asked him for advice on like all of these different things. And if I had just asked chat GBT, that I'm sure it would've given me an answer, but I wouldn't have had that relationship with Ted. Yeah. So that's like kind of the other side that I think of is how do we balance, like using AI to make us stronger in our relationships without losing that human touch. Because you don't wanna be an uneducated idiot asking someone who makes a hundred million dollars a year questions'cause they're gonna look at you like you're dumb. Right? A hundred percent. But also like. I'm sure you did your research, but still go and make that human connection and ask the people who have done what you want to do.'cause Chad, GPT hasn't made a hundred million dollars in a year in sales in the real world. Right? Like. I don't, I don't even know if the AI makes that much money, like on the profit that it's generating for the, the companies. I think it still loses money. So like I, I think that there's like a little with the art of connecting, thinking about like, how do we use AI to strengthen our human relationships and get into higher intelligence and better rooms. But also not having that be a crutch to not go talk to the people because if I hadn't have sat down and asked Ted all of those, what probably would've been silly questions. Now that I know what I know, I wouldn't have been able to do all of my private loans with him and. You know, I'm sure I could have figured it out and I, I would've figured it out, but that made it a lot easier to, to buy properties with zero money outta my pocket. Like literally I could, I could purchase a property and not come out of pocket a dollar with his money. Yeah. I mean, to your point, right, it's the AI is not gonna replace emotional intelligence. AI is not gonna replace the human elements. It's a computer. Right. So I think you have to look at it in the context of. Education, you have to look at it in context of, you know, speed and efficiency and how quickly you can close the gap on solving some of your problems. Right. And, and to your point, you know, I think the human element and the belly to belly, the palm to palm the relationships that you're in, proximity with people. Nothing will ever be able to trump that aspect of relationship building. Right? Like I, I don't, as much as I love my, you know, my, my speed and efficiency of my ai, I have zero. You know, actual human emotional, you know, feelings towards the ai. It's just a means to an end. But when you talk about real relationships, right, there are many components of what make real relationships sticky and valuable and important and impactful that AI and technology won't be able to close the gap on or, or bridge, right? So I think it's a good point that you make up. I think in the context of what you're asking for you know, at the end of the day when somebody asks me to pick my brain or to, you know, go out to coffee because time is just so precious I just don't do it. I don't do it. Or I, I put up multiple roadblocks and I gate keep, you know, that opportunity in that time and, and people that get around those roadblocks and show that they're willing to put in the time and invest and bring the value. I 100% wanna invest my time with them. I wanna build relationships with them. So I think that's just something to keep in mind. It doesn't need to be, you know, a replacement to how you approach creating relationships. It just needs to be an accelerant and a bolt-on to the strategy and the tactical, you know, approach of maybe how you deliver it. But it still requires you to be the vessel that provides, you know, the value and, and, and exchanges, you know, the relationship value and, and currency that obviously great relationships are relying upon. Yeah, I, I think that's a per, like you just created. The perfect example for what I was trying to get at is, so say someone wants to meet you or let's use a, you know, maybe someone who's like famous for example, or. Super busy businessman's, the CEO of a big company in town, you've always wanted to meet and like just learn from, put in a chat and say, I wanna meet this person. How do I get around the roadblocks to meet them? Right? And it'll say, it'll probably say like, figure out who their executive assistant is.'cause you and I both have executive assistants, we had our executive assistants going back and forth with each other to figure out like. When we could meet. But you know, they're gonna have an executive assistant. If you can get in with that executive assistant, you're on their calendar.'cause they control it. Like, like there's a local hotelier here. He owns 26 hotels across four states and their headquartered in Chattanooga, a team of, you know, over a thousand employees. And I, I've wanted to meet'em for like two years. And I finally, finally was able to figure out my way in. A friend of mine was friends with him, connected us via email, and then he sent me to his EA and we got it on the calendar to get him on the podcast. So, you know, that's just one example of how. I'm able to get past the door and I, I think maybe this would be interesting to hear from you. No matter how high up you get the ladder, right, our time is more valuable than it was when we started. Yeah. There's still people that you want to meet that you probably can't get on their calendar, right? Oh, a hundred percent. Yeah. So what are some ways that you, like you work to get on the people's calendar, who you're going after to meet and be mentored by? I mean, I think obviously d when different levels require different strategies, right? And so when you have maybe a little bit more of a Rolodex and you've got more of a reputation and a resume that you can point to, you know, I think there's some strategic ways. One thing that I always try and do is you know, we've got, I've got. An AI bot that is set up that, you know, I've got basically a hit list of people that I want to be building relationships with. And so instead of me just banging on their door and expecting a meeting more so it's, it's to drip my presence. On the things that they are actively showing are important to them, and the best way that you can, you know, know what is important to them and where they're spending their time, energy, and effort is oftentimes on all of their social medias, right? So anytime somebody makes a post. I get notified and what am I gonna do? I'm gonna go over there and leave a thoughtful comment and just kind of start building relationship instead of just jumping into their dms and saying, Hey, I love your brand. I love your mission. Can we get on a, you know, a call and do X, y, and z? I'm gonna, I'm gonna, you know, pepper them with some, some value and some, some comments and some feedback. We're all egotistical humans at the end of the day, and so you can get on and. You know, add value and share your thoughts and, you know, acknowledge or affirm you know what they're doing and spending time with. That's one little way, right. Another one is, of course, you know, warm connections. I love to leverage my network being that most of the time I'm always just looking to add value and make deposits into other people's lives. And trusting that if I do that consistently over the long term, when I need to go up to that, you know bank account and make a withdraw, I've got plenty of deposits that I've made in there. And so if somebody has the ability to make a warm connection, hey, do you know John, you know, over at at Blackstone? Yeah, actually I do. You know, I don't want to, you know, just cold email him and I don't wanna be disrespectful or any of that, like. Are you in a position where you think you could make a, you know, a warm introduction to to, to John? For me? Yeah. Man, I'd be happy to do that. Like you've always been, blah, blah. Okay, cool. Right, so like thinking about long-term relationship building, I'm a farmer. I don't walk up to a raw piece of land and immediately think that because I planted the seeds that all of a sudden 10 seconds later, I'm gonna look up and there's gonna be a farm full of crop that are just yielding beautiful fruit that I'm gonna get to get fat and happy on, right? The farmer knows that it takes time, it takes seasons and discipline consistently for a long period of time to generate something fruitful. So that's the way I look at every relationship building opportunity. Just like wealth is made in the crockpot, so are amazing relationships, just like wealth isn't made in the microwave, so are amazing. So aren't amazing relationships. It takes time to foster these things, right? So, you know, metaphorically, I look at my relationships as I've got a raw piece of dirt. I need to rota till this dirt and put some work in. I need to plant seeds consistently. I need to go and nurture and water that crop over and over and over again, and trust that over time it will grow into something that will yield some type of fruit, right? And so that's the way I look at all of my relationships. It's not what can I get from you and can I make this transactional? And what if you know, what can you do for me and serve me and serve me? Right? People that are smart, sniff that out so fast and they want nothing to do with those people. Yeah. The opposite is the people who know that you're making consistent efforts and you're not just self-serving and you're asking at the end of every call, Hey, what? What do you got going on? Is there anything I can support you with? Like, is there any value I can offer you? Hey, if there's anything that you need and whether it has anything to do with me or not, like just reach out. I got a great network. If I can connect you with somebody, like I would love to help bring value to you. Those little things over time really add up to a way to be like, Hey, I like this guy, Matt. He's always asking, you know, good questions. He's trying to bring value to me. And so you do that enough with enough people. All of a sudden you look up in your web and your network of who you can get in contact with becomes a little bit stronger, a little bit more advantageous, and so. Now at my level, you know, I'm trying to get in the room with Deca, you know, and sent to millionaires and, you know, funds that are 500 to a billion dollars and right, like those are pretty close, tight-knit rooms that unless you know somebody in those rooms. You're likely not gonna find your way into them or, you know, be able to cold email or cold call them and get a quality response. Right? So those are just some of the things that I do, you know, that are kind of soft approaches that allow me to, you know, and then obviously pain, pain to get into rooms is a, is a great way if you believe in yourself and how you carry yourself. And you can get into a mastermind or an event that has some real killers in it, right? Hey, I mean, some of my best relationships that have led to some of my most lucrative opportunities in my life have come from just paying to be in those rooms. And that's a quick, you know, fog the mirror test to see if you can stroke a check and you're at this status, you can get in these rooms. And if you're a good quality person and you believe in yourself and you can get in those rooms, you're, you're gonna meet, you know, a couple relationships that'll change your life. Yeah. And kind of I know you have a a we have things to get to so I wanna be honoring of your time, but one thought that I get off of that is, and I think you kind of alluded to it, is treating every single person, like they're the person who you wanna meet, right? Like, and I think about that because if I treat people differently based on how much money they have or their status, a lot of connections that I've been made from the people who I are, like on my dream list of meeting people came from. Those warm connections came from people that are your everyday person. Yeah. Right. They, they work a normal job and then you, in conversation, you're having a great conversation, learning about their life, learning about what they like. They go, oh, yeah, by the way, my, my brother is this billionaire that does this. You know this company. And it's like, oh, oh, really? It's like, yeah, I wanna introduce you to him. He'll like you. Oh, oh, okay. Yeah, he's, he's friends with this guy. Oh. Oh, okay. And you never know who that person is, so we have to treat every person like their brother or their sister or their mother as the person who's on the top of your dream list to meet. And that just comes from a genuine place of like loving others and like, yeah, being curious about what people have going on in their life and. I think it can be difficult for busy entrepreneurs like us, like I literally have been running and on the, or on the phone since I got my feet touched the ground this morning. But you know, if you can bring value to people in any time that you meet them, when you are that busy. You're just, I love you, you talking about you're depositing into that bank account. You're, you're building up that relation, that relational capital. There's actually a book behind me called the Business Bank Account and or the, sorry, the relationship bank account that Jeff Fester wrote. And yeah, you just gotta be putting in deposits every day, every chance that you get because you don't know who that person that you're meeting next. I never assume that they don't know the person, that that could be the key to your next revelation or the next, you know, step forward in your business. Yeah, I mean, I think too, at the end of the day, it's what do you, who do you wanna be known as? What do you wanna be known for? And, you know, when I get to my, my deathbed, you know, my definition of success is not how many commas and zeros I have in my bank account. It's not how many trophies I have up on my wall, or how many, you know, articles I was featured in. It's gonna be, what do my kids say about me? What does my wife say about me? What do my friends say about me? What do people that don't even know? Who I am say about me, right? And how you were teaching and treating and, and leading your life and other people in that process. And I can say overwhelmingly with confidence that if you lead with genuine curiosity, you lead with trying to bring value to people, you lead with just being respectful, you're consistent, you know, you do the basic fundamental 1 0 1 stuff of relationship building. You're gonna be insanely amazed by the people that you get connected to because those high caliber, high quality people that you wanna be around, they are magnets for other people that are just like that. And they are deterrent for people that are opposite of that. That's right. So if you really are that person and you can consistently show up that way, not only will you be attractive to them. Guess what? That person is attractive to a lot of other people that are just like that. And likely if you can build the relationship there, there's a door with many other doors, just like the one you walk through that they can potentially help you get up to that knock on the door, help you even open it, right, and allow you to step into it. So for me, again, it's all about that crock pot mindset. It's just knowing that it takes time. It takes, you know, the, the right ingredients need time to fuse together to create something great. Yeah, you could probably get some surface level acquaintance, you know, in the microwave, but it's really not gonna lead to the real relationships, the real opportunities, the real experiences that completely transform your life. Yeah, man. I think about, oh, I, I'm gonna, this will be the last comment and I'm gonna ask you our final question, but I don't know if you know my friend Shane, so, or not, he's financed about 80 million of a real estate portfolio owner finance, and he's, he's growing his community with his school and masterminds and stuff like that. And he came to Chattanooga, my hometown one time, and. Me and Shane have just shared value back and forth with each other. We're, we're always trying to figure out how we can support each other. And he came here and, and he, I've been talking with him about how I wanted to meet Ben Maah for a long, like I've been watching Ben MA's videos since he started making YouTube videos. And Shane comes to Chattanooga on a Saturday and he sees me, he goes, oh, Haydynn, what are you doing on, what are you doing on Wednesday? And I had a meeting with one of the biggest developers in town. I was like, ah, yeah, I've got a meeting. I was like, what's going on? He said, oh I was just gonna invite you to come to Ben MA's house with me if you wanted to go to Florida. And I was like, I don't have a meeting anymore. I'll be there. And on Wednesday, I'm, I'm hanging out with Ben Mulah at his house for the day and. That was an amazing experience. But that all came from, you know, I volunteered at several of his classes and done my, I've had him at my real estate meetups. Sent him, sent him clients and stuff like that. Introduced him to a lot of my cool friends, and we just deposit into each other and it's. So fun to just watch, like being able to, for us to give back and forth relationships like that. So, yeah. I wanna ask you our final question here,'cause I wanna be respectful of your time. And that is, what is a connection to a person or group of people that's changed the trajectory of your life or career? It's a great question'cause I could point to so many relationships. I mean, from. Tim Road, who's one of the founders of GoBundance, one of my early mentors, introduced me to him. I volunteered for his charity. He took me to one of the first GoBundance Mastermind events. That was really before GoBundance was even the Mastermind and called GoBundance. And then obviously I've been a part of that group and organization for 10 plus years and has. Opened up so many doors to amazing people, experiences traveling the world, right? I mean, that's just one little tiny example. Another really cool one that I always like to share is when I was first getting my, my flipping business going, I was doing a lot of direct mail marketing and I sent out a mailer. An owner responded, I went over and toured their house. It was an older couple in like their late sixties. And they were divesting out a lot of their rentals to get into doing more private money lending. They wanted to less, you know, property management, more private lending. I walked through the house with them. I'm 21 years old at this time, and he goes you're not gonna buy my house. He goes, but I like you. I like how you showed up. I like how you carry yourself. I like your vision. I'm gonna sell this house, and once I do, gimme a call for your next flip and I'll be your private money lender. Man, that, that one mailer that opened up the door to that relationship over the course of the next, call it 11, 12 years, I've done over 90 private loans with them. Wow. They have become amazing family friends. I go over to their house and have breakfast with them once a month. They, they have opened the door to so many other opportunities for me, and it all started with one mailer and one relationship. Right? And so, you know, you just never know. I mean, that family that, that, those two people gave me opportunities in my real estate investing career. To buy properties that I, you know, I would love to say that I would've figured out otherwise, but without them and, and with the opportunity they provided, it put me on a path that has led me to then buying my first, she funded my very first hotel. She funded my very first shopping center. So I would've never, not only got into flipping and scaled my flipping business, I probably wouldn't have bought my first commercial assets with them, my first hotel that I bought with them. So there was just so many things that happened because of that one mailer, that one relationship looking back on holy cow, like financially did it not only change my life, but the life I've been able to create. Design for my kids and my wife and, and what that looks like is more priceless to me than any amount of money that I've added to my net worth and balance sheet statement. And so that's, that's a perfect example. If you just never know where one relationship, one conversation, one opportunity can completely transform the trajectory of your life. Man, that's that. I don't know if we could put a, a better cherry on top of the show there. Well, Matt, if people want to follow you or come to your masterminds or learn more about your coaching, where do people do that? They can go to anything on commercial real estate wise investor collective.com. That's our commercial real estate mastermind community. My, my handle is the same on all social media platforms at Official Mattea and I have my website matt aitchison.com and you can always reach out to me on there as well. Awesome. Well, thank you so much for coming on the show. I really, really appreciate it, and look forward to talking more and just getting, getting to know you better and hopefully even get to come out some of your, come out to some of your events. I think that'd be awesome. So. Sounds great, man. Thank you so much for coming on the show, man. Thanks for having me. All right.